If you are in the middle of a divorce, you may be thinking of what you want, and how you want to set up your life after your divorce. It may not even occur to you that you can make crucial mistakes during the divorce process that can seriously affect your ability to either get what you want out of your divorce, or that can come back to haunt you years after the divorce is over.
Think Long Term
It can be tempting to think of what you want right now, or to think of your work schedule, personal life, or living situation when the divorce is happening. Your divorce agreement or judgment is generally forever, with limited exceptions to make certain modifications.
Just because you have a job now that allows you to pick up your child from school does not mean you always will. Just because you may not need a certain asset now does not mean you never will. You will not be single forever. Just because it is easier to just forget asking for alimony now, that does not mean that you will not need it down the line. The bottom line is that you should consider long term effects of your decisions at the time of divorce.
Do Not Believe Other People (or the Internet)
Many people go online and read stories about who got what from a divorce. Or, they may talk to friends and family about what they got in or from their divorce.
Remember that every divorce is different. Not only are the facts and circumstances of everyone’s life different, but your personal choices are different; one person may choose to fight every issue all the way to court, and another may choose to settle the divorce to move on with life quickly. There is no right or wrong way, but you cannot compare the result of two divorces.
Failing to Get Expert Help
Depending on your case, you may need experts. Expert financial advisors can review a spouse’s financials (or the financials of his or her business). Experts in child psychology can assist in custody disputes. Private investigators can assist in uncovering things your spouse may want to keep hidden. Experts do cost money, but in many divorces, it can be money well spent.
Every family law case involves some emotion. The problems arise when emotion prevents you from making smart and rational decisions.
Are you fighting for the extra day with your children because the extra day is important to you, or are you fighting for it just to spite your ex? Are you fighting or alimony because you need it or because you want to make your ex’s life as difficult as possible post-divorce?
Remember that emotions will fade in time, and when they do, you will be better served making decisions that make smart business and personal sense, as opposed to those that are made out of anger or spite.
You have questions about your divorce, or what you can expect. We can help. Contact The Law Office of Agnes Rybar LLC for help and guidance in your family law case.